Wednesday, April 29, 2009

I need to grow up

My soon to be sister-in-law posted a link on Facebook regarding the Swine Flu. Here is the URL from when the page was loading:

Does anyone else see the word "Farticles" in there? Not once, but twice!!!

I'm still giggling...

Monday, April 27, 2009


Is anyone else so over all of this swine flu baloney?

Tuesday, April 21, 2009


Here is some new footage of those two Domino's workers that got me off of pizza and hoagies for at least the next two months:

"Who likes fartin' on sammitches?"

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Ready to feel good about life?

On Sunday, April 5, 2009, someone found my blog by googling the exact phrase "devouring a turd."

That completes me.


Yikes. Sorry. Some stuff has happened in the past few months. Would you like to hear about it? Oh, good! Here goes-

Wedding planning! Yay!!!! *Cartoon hearts* *baby dogs* *candy canes* *tiny cupids floating around in diapers*! Ok so maybe its not actually that much fun (but I feel guilty when I complain about it because its supposed to be such a wonderful experience blah, blah, blah). But seriously, why does it have to be so frustrating? I was told the original venue we wanted for the reception won't be big enough and the new room has zero windows, the *worst* carpeting ever, and MUSTARD YELLOW BANQUET CHAIRS. Jesus, really? Good thing the theme is going to be "Feels Just Like Grandpa's Shitty 1972 Oldsmobile." Favors will include a pack of Lucky Strikes, a pine-scented air freshener, and one of these.

I strongly dislike twitter. I don't really have a good reason, in fact I've never been on it, but I have been on the new facebook. And I imagine twitter being like the most annoying parts of the new facebook without any redeeming qualities like being able to look at pictures of people you used to know while laughing at how bad they look now. Oh and you know what else? Your top 5 list of who-fucking-cares actually made it on my top 5 list of reasons why I fucking hate you. Isn't that neat?

It would appear that not blogging for several months has turned me into a raging bitch. Also, I just discovered that I cannot blog and listen to my Ipod at the same time, which is sad.

On a good note, I saw the Flight of the Conchords last night and it was even more amazing than I hoped it would be. The acoustic version of Sugar Lumps was simply delicious!

And I promise I'll try to eat more fiber (be more regular- for those of you who aren't into poop-humor).