Is anyone else so over all of this swine flu baloney?
Monday, April 27, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
D-effing-lightful!
Here is some new footage of those two Domino's workers that got me off of pizza and hoagies for at least the next two months:
"Who likes fartin' on sammitches?"
Nasty Domino's Workers - UNSEEN FOOTAGE! - watch more funny videos
"Who likes fartin' on sammitches?"
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Ready to feel good about life?
On Sunday, April 5, 2009, someone found my blog by googling the exact phrase "devouring a turd."
That completes me.
That completes me.
3/28-4/16
Yikes. Sorry. Some stuff has happened in the past few months. Would you like to hear about it? Oh, good! Here goes-
Wedding planning! Yay!!!! *Cartoon hearts* *baby dogs* *candy canes* *tiny cupids floating around in diapers*! Ok so maybe its not actually that much fun (but I feel guilty when I complain about it because its supposed to be such a wonderful experience blah, blah, blah). But seriously, why does it have to be so frustrating? I was told the original venue we wanted for the reception won't be big enough and the new room has zero windows, the *worst* carpeting ever, and MUSTARD YELLOW BANQUET CHAIRS. Jesus, really? Good thing the theme is going to be "Feels Just Like Grandpa's Shitty 1972 Oldsmobile." Favors will include a pack of Lucky Strikes, a pine-scented air freshener, and one of these.
I strongly dislike twitter. I don't really have a good reason, in fact I've never been on it, but I have been on the new facebook. And I imagine twitter being like the most annoying parts of the new facebook without any redeeming qualities like being able to look at pictures of people you used to know while laughing at how bad they look now. Oh and you know what else? Your top 5 list of who-fucking-cares actually made it on my top 5 list of reasons why I fucking hate you. Isn't that neat?
It would appear that not blogging for several months has turned me into a raging bitch. Also, I just discovered that I cannot blog and listen to my Ipod at the same time, which is sad.
On a good note, I saw the Flight of the Conchords last night and it was even more amazing than I hoped it would be. The acoustic version of Sugar Lumps was simply delicious!
And I promise I'll try to eat more fiber (be more regular- for those of you who aren't into poop-humor).
Wedding planning! Yay!!!! *Cartoon hearts* *baby dogs* *candy canes* *tiny cupids floating around in diapers*! Ok so maybe its not actually that much fun (but I feel guilty when I complain about it because its supposed to be such a wonderful experience blah, blah, blah). But seriously, why does it have to be so frustrating? I was told the original venue we wanted for the reception won't be big enough and the new room has zero windows, the *worst* carpeting ever, and MUSTARD YELLOW BANQUET CHAIRS. Jesus, really? Good thing the theme is going to be "Feels Just Like Grandpa's Shitty 1972 Oldsmobile." Favors will include a pack of Lucky Strikes, a pine-scented air freshener, and one of these.
I strongly dislike twitter. I don't really have a good reason, in fact I've never been on it, but I have been on the new facebook. And I imagine twitter being like the most annoying parts of the new facebook without any redeeming qualities like being able to look at pictures of people you used to know while laughing at how bad they look now. Oh and you know what else? Your top 5 list of who-fucking-cares actually made it on my top 5 list of reasons why I fucking hate you. Isn't that neat?
It would appear that not blogging for several months has turned me into a raging bitch. Also, I just discovered that I cannot blog and listen to my Ipod at the same time, which is sad.
On a good note, I saw the Flight of the Conchords last night and it was even more amazing than I hoped it would be. The acoustic version of Sugar Lumps was simply delicious!
And I promise I'll try to eat more fiber (be more regular- for those of you who aren't into poop-humor).
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
The distance between us is ever so apparent...
I had one of those days where I wanted to find old friends on Facebook. There was one girl in particular I wanted to find, lets call her Karin. Karin and I were the bestest of best friends growing up. Like, we were completely inseparable- until her family moved.
Even after the move we stayed friends though. I'd see her every Christmas and usually once during the summer, as most of her family still lived in the area. I remember having crushes on several of her cousins that I'd meet at various family functions. Most notable was Kenneth, because I kept asking him, "What's the frequency, Kenneth ?" thinking it would be cute or funny or whatever (because I'm sure he'd never heard that one before). Ugh. Anyways, I digress. As the years went by we eventually lost touch. I hadn't thought about her in a long time but recently my mom was telling me how she ran into one of Karin's aunts.
So I looked her up on the old F-book and sent out my friend request. It was accepted a few hours later and of course I went to her page to see what she's been up to. I saw the following:
I think to myself, ok so we've certainly followed different paths since the good old days of playing barbies and secretary (yes, we used to play secretary- don't judge). But the kicker really came when I was browsing her personal interests section which included this lil nugget: "impromptu Bible studies." My old best friend, the person I was so similar to in my youth, enjoys impromptu Bible studies so much that she included it on her personal internet profile?
To each their own, but yikes, that's hardcore. I've never been to a planned Bible study, let alone a spontaneous, off-the-cuff let's just sit down right here in this Starbucks and dive into some First Corinthians for the sheer fun of it type shit.
But to be fair, she's probably lighting a candle for me right now considering my profile states that I'm a Libertarian whose religious view is "we follow the hawk" and my favorite book is "My signed copy of "I Had the Right to Remain Silent...But I Didn't Have the Ability" by Ron "Tater Salad" White."
Even after the move we stayed friends though. I'd see her every Christmas and usually once during the summer, as most of her family still lived in the area. I remember having crushes on several of her cousins that I'd meet at various family functions. Most notable was Kenneth, because I kept asking him, "What's the frequency, Kenneth ?" thinking it would be cute or funny or whatever (because I'm sure he'd never heard that one before). Ugh. Anyways, I digress. As the years went by we eventually lost touch. I hadn't thought about her in a long time but recently my mom was telling me how she ran into one of Karin's aunts.
So I looked her up on the old F-book and sent out my friend request. It was accepted a few hours later and of course I went to her page to see what she's been up to. I saw the following:
Political Views: Conservative
Religious Views: Romans 8:38-39
I think to myself, ok so we've certainly followed different paths since the good old days of playing barbies and secretary (yes, we used to play secretary- don't judge). But the kicker really came when I was browsing her personal interests section which included this lil nugget: "impromptu Bible studies." My old best friend, the person I was so similar to in my youth, enjoys impromptu Bible studies so much that she included it on her personal internet profile?
To each their own, but yikes, that's hardcore. I've never been to a planned Bible study, let alone a spontaneous, off-the-cuff let's just sit down right here in this Starbucks and dive into some First Corinthians for the sheer fun of it type shit.
But to be fair, she's probably lighting a candle for me right now considering my profile states that I'm a Libertarian whose religious view is "we follow the hawk" and my favorite book is "My signed copy of "I Had the Right to Remain Silent...But I Didn't Have the Ability" by Ron "Tater Salad" White."
Monday, March 2, 2009
An Important Message From Vex and the City
Sorry. I know, I know- I'm a huge slacker and a disappointment overall. Lay off me, mom.
I'll get back into the swing of this whole blogging thing soon, but for now I had to share something very important regarding a cause that is close to my heart- Yorkies.
I came across this link: http://stylenews.peoplestylewatch.com/2007/08/18/ which had this *adorable* picture:
Do you see what I see?
It seems that somebody at People magazine forgot to photoshop this little guys red-wiener out. Either that or they wanted to graphically illustrate just how turned on your dog will be when wearing one of these wigs.
***We here at Vex and the City do not approve of the sexual objectification of baby Yorkies to further the capitalist agenda of corporate America.***
****We do, however, approve of such objectification if it is used to further the humor agenda of blogging America.****
Thank you.
I'll get back into the swing of this whole blogging thing soon, but for now I had to share something very important regarding a cause that is close to my heart- Yorkies.
I came across this link: http://stylenews.peoplestylewatch.com/2007/08/18/ which had this *adorable* picture:
Do you see what I see?
It seems that somebody at People magazine forgot to photoshop this little guys red-wiener out. Either that or they wanted to graphically illustrate just how turned on your dog will be when wearing one of these wigs.
***We here at Vex and the City do not approve of the sexual objectification of baby Yorkies to further the capitalist agenda of corporate America.***
****We do, however, approve of such objectification if it is used to further the humor agenda of blogging America.****
Thank you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)